Dear Ultimate Abbey,

Do you take advantage of your birthday? Is it ok to not want to be with my kids and is it ok do do my own thing? I feel selfish… Dear Concerned Mommy, I have

Do you take advantage of your birthday? Is it ok to not want to be with my kids and is it ok do do my own thing? I feel selfish…

Dear Concerned Mommy, I have to be honest with you. I take my birthday and make it in to an event that usually lasts 3 days. LOL! WHY? I give myself to everyone else for the entire year. The other 362 days a year, I give to others!
Even though this is something I have done for years I still have a little guilt. It’s the mom guilt we tend to feel when we do ANYTHING for ourselves. Honestly, our mom guilt needs to be put in its place. On YOUR birthday put the guilt in its place!
Usually beginning a day before my birthday, I get a massage and I make my own schedule. If I feel like getting up later, running with my girlfriends and staying for coffee afterwards, I do that. Instead of rushing to get home, I stay, I enjoy, I do not feel bad. This takes time to get there and it has a lot to do with finding your worth.

Does this suck for some of my favorite humans? Well, yes it does.

I say it sucks for them because I don’t do my normal routine. My roles as a mother ( and if you are a mother you know) include but not limited too; nurse, counselor, chef, taxi, assistant, etc. I drop a lot of it, I am still working on this. Always room for improvement. Usually I come home and they are happy SO I am sure they are fine!

Its good for them (the kids, the hubby) to figure things out while mom isn’t there. I have boys and my famous saying is, ” I am raising men not boys”. All children, including girls, need to learn how to cope without mom. Whether dad or another guardian is there, we must trust as mothers, we have taught our children well and they can survive without mom being there for a few hours.

Unless your children are babies they do not need us every moment of everyday. Even babies, it is ok to leave for a few hours to get some alone time if you know your child is in the trusting hands of another.

So, Good Momma, I do not think you are selfish at all. I think you are trying to take care of yourself. We need to take care of us first in order to be the best mommies we can be!

Sincerely,

Ultimate Abbey